The walls were not painted very well and were not very strong. The floor was dirty and the walls had stickers of girls pasted stiffly on it. It seemed to them like it was a girl’s room.
Daphne Freddie lay down two blue trolley bags. Freddie laid the children on them and they at first explored the house. The house had four large bedrooms, one kitchen, a terrace and two other rooms which seemed like dining room and drawing room. The two of the four bedrooms also had a balcony. Then Freddie and Daphne went back and laid the blankets and stuff. Freddie picked up both the children and laid them on the mattress sort of thing. The night was over in a minute although everybody slept peacefully. Everybody woke up late the next morning it was a very busy and a short day. Everybody at first had their breakfast and then mom and dad started to unpack things. Meanwhile Susan and Shaggy explored the house. “Susan! Shaggy! Come and help me!” “Coming mom. Just a minute. We were exploring our new house. Mother, can we just checkout our lawn and backyard?” “You can go at 5:00 p.m. till that time, come and help me.”
Watch out for the next part........... Coming soon
I agree Khadija and Urwa. Anyway, as a friend I would like to request u to publish it as a novel. It would be just cool!(If u want to;of course) and one more thing that pleaseeeeeeeeee add me as your friend Duaa. Pleaseeeeee!!!!
There are grammar mistakes. For example,
1) "Daphne Freddie lay down two blue trolley bags."
It should be, "Daphne and Freddie lay down two blue trolley bags."
2) "Everybody woke up late the next morning it was a very busy and a short day. "
Here, either you can make two sentences out of it, i.e. "Everybody woke up late the next morning. It was a very busy and short day." Or you could put a semicolon, i.e. "Everybody woke up late the next morning;it was a very busy and a short day." But I would prefer making it into two sentences.
Overall, nice story, but the name of your story is The Enchanted Tree, and there's no mention of a tree in the first two parts. If this were a novel, it woould be okay, but people wouldn't be interested if you wrote so many parts without even mentioning the title.