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Sana Raheel
Sana Raheel
Pakistan International School, Riyadh
The Brave Girl
Published On May 30th 2013
Total Comments : 22
Total Views :  877
8 People Like this!


Rank 9 Out of 10
The Brave Girl (last part included)
Tehreem felt like crying. Her father was going to America and she was gonna stay at home with her two sisters and two brothers. She was in tenth but she couldn’t study further because her father could not bear the expenses. She had two brothers but they were in grade 4 and one was in sixth.  Tehreem had another sister who was in going to start grade 1. Due to the expenses, Tehreem’s dad had to go to America in search of a job. Tehreem wanted to go with him but he refused. He said: firstly, it’s too dangerous. Secondly, I can’t afford two tickets.  So he was going that night. He had enough money to buy two tickets but he had to leave some money for his home and he needed some for his own expenses like food, shelter and taxi. He came to America safely but he did not notice the man who was just behind him. He said to him: Sir, do you know this place? Tehreem’s father: No. So the man said: allow me to show you around. Tehreem’s father agreed. The two men came to a construction company which was closed. The man showed Tehreem’s father a pistol and said: Keep your hands in the air and…….
 “……………….give me everything that you have.” He gave the thief everything, his wallet, mobile, etc. The man then pushed Tehreem’s father in a huge hole. Then the thief started to run away as he saw a man looking from the bushes to him. The man who was hiding saw that he was trying to run away so he ran after him. The thief got away and the man (who was hiding) got some people to help him and got Tehreem’s father out of the hole. He was in the hospital and he had a severe injury near the head. No one knew who his identity as his wallet with his iqama was taken and his mobile with all of his contact numbers.
After some weeks without a phone from their father, Tehreem was very worried and as for her mother, she was ill with worry. Her siblings were small so they could not understand that why was their mother so worried. In the night, Tehreem thought that a lot of time has passed; my father is not even calling, not even receiving a call so I should go---- but how can I go? The money father left us with is half gone, what about the money for a ticket, for her home……It is too much puzzling.  With this she went to sleep.
In the morning, Tehreem said to her mother that she will do a small job to collect enough money to go and find her father. Her mother replied: No it is too dangerous, you can’t go and what can u do, you are only a tenth grader. But Tehreem said: Trust me, I will do something.
 Tehreem went to her room and thought: What CAN I do? Mom is right, I can’t do anything----but I can’t just stay here. Then she thought: of course!! I can tutor pre kg. I tutored my small brother so I can tutor other people. Then she went to her mom and asked her if she could do this. Her mom replied:……………………
 ‘………Of course no. How did you imagine that? It’s not your job to do this—It’s my.’  ‘But mom---‘I said NO. End of discussion.’ Tehreem left the room feeling that she is gonna cry. Then at lunch, when her mom was in a better mood she plucked up her courage and said: ‘Mom please listen to me first before you u start arguing.’ Her mother said: ’Ok.’ Tehreem said: ’Mom, I know that you don’t like my idea, but think about it. You are very ill; you can’t do anything at all. And even if u collected enough money to go, you cannot go. Think once about Aisha, Hania, Osman or Tariq. You can’t leave without them; they are very attached to you. And I am not a small child anymore. I am sixteen years old. I can go, and you know that.’ Her mom reluctantly replied: ‘hmm… let me think about it.’
In the morning her mother replied: ‘Ok you can do the job to go BUT u must call me daily.’ Tehreem replied: ‘thank you very much mom. I love you.’ Tehreem went to her room and started thinking of how to go. On the other hand, Tehreem’s father was in the hospital in a very serious situation. His injury was very severe and he was still in the state of unconsciousness.  Two rings made of gold were in his pocket so the people of the hospital sold them and gave him basic medical treatment and so he was alive.
Tehreem started her small ‘school’ and earned some money. One day, a girl whom she tutored started crying as it was her first day in school, so, since Tehreem was very soft hearted, she started playing with the children. At that time a child, the oldest of them was losing so she told the parent’s at home time that they were playing from the whole day. The little child was very innocent and wanted to tell someone that her teacher was playing. And she told all parents that secret.
The parents were very angry with her and said: We give you money and children and you betray us? We will take our children and don’t dare to ask us for your fees.’ So they took their children and left. Tehreem decided to………………….
Tehreem decided to apply to a school as a helper but she didn’t get a job. When she had almost given up hope, she saw a competition that would give ten thousand dollars to the person who won. All she had to do was eat a chocolate in front of the judges. It wasn’t any ordinary chocolate. It was really big and was extra sweet and no one was able to do it because it hurt their teeth so much. Tehreem had not tasted sweets since she had gone in grade 2. She remembered its sweet taste and remembered how she had been really fond of sweets. She decided to enter, it wouldn’t cost a penny and if she was lucky enough she might win. So, she entered her name and, surprisingly she came in after 1 person…She saw through the window that he ate five to six bites and left. She saw the chocolate it was bigger than seeing it through the window. Tehreem had been out all morning and hadn’t bothered for breakfast and had no money for lunch. It was five and her stomach was rumbling. She heard someone saying Eat! So she did….It was really tasty especially after a whole day of nothing to eat. She ate it whole and wanted another but she found it rude to ask for another chocolate. The judges were amazed and felt that they should announce her as winner for a month had passed and no one ever won. They announced her as winner gave her a cell phone and told her to get her prize money tomorrow in front of people. She agreed and left. She rushed as fast as she could to her home and did. She couldn’t wait to tell everyone in her home.
When she finally arrived after what seemed like centuries, she found her mother looking outside with a worried expression on her face. She bought her inside and asked her if she wanted to eat something but Tehreem cut her short and said: ‘Mother I won a competition of winning ten thousand dollars. I went to seek a job to a school they had no vacancy I went to seven or eight schools, none had vacancy and when I had given up hope, then my stomach gave a loud rumble. I saw a fair and went there for something to eat then I found this competition and won it! They gave me a cell phone and told me to come to the same place tomorrow as the will set up a stage then, then…………’  Tehreem out of shock and happiness had fainted. Her mother took her to bed and thought of leaving her that way as she looked very tired. Then Tehreem woke up after two and a half hour by a phone ringing. She remembered a dream where she won a competition but could it be a dream? She thought. Then she saw her new phone and she felt happy then suddenly----- Her stomach gave a round RUMBLE! She needed to eat something for sure. She ate a really heavy dinner and she felt as a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders. Then her phone rang and a person said: Are you Miss Tehreem?’ ‘Yes’ ‘Ma’am you won a competition today of eating a chocolate which you passed and you will get your prize money tomorrow so come at 12 o’ clock in the Good Dreams Hall’ ‘But sir that is the biggest, and most important hall in the city!’ ‘Yes I am aware. Do come in time.’ ‘Yes sir, I will but sir can I bring my family?’ ‘Sure.’ ‘Bye Sir’ ‘Bye.’
Then, at 11 o’clock Tehreem left her home with her family, everyone in their best clothes. They arrived at five minutes to twelve and entered the great hall. After some minutes a man came and gave a short speech then called Tehreem to the stage. Tehreem did and received her money. Then as a surprise, they had a feast in the hall. They all ate to their full and Tehreem received ten to fifteen boxes full of chocolates. She hurried to the nearest ticket office and bought a ticket to America, two days later. She packed all of her clothes and bought all necessary items to stay comfortably with her father. She left a thousand dollars which after conversion became twenty thousand rupees and Tehreem took eight thousand dollars with herself. ` She remembered to be in a plane where she thought only of her father. Then she arrived to the airport and, after collecting her luggage, took a cab and went to a good hotel with two beds, one for her father and one for herself. The next day, Tehreem had ordered breakfast, She saw a newspaper within and a small heading caught her eye………….
[Last part]
           ………The Heading said: ‘No Clues---YET’
Tehreem read it with great interest because she felt that this was the sort of thing that might tell her—or give her a clue—if any-- about of her father. It read:
No clues have yet been found about the person who was shot, then robbed in a construction site. It all happened about a month ago. A man found him and bought him to the hospital. He had nothing. He needs a surgery to see his injury in the head. The doctors found two gold rings in the lining of his jacket with a note that reads ‘Just in case.’ After that, nothing is known of him. The money from his gold rings is almost out. If you know him, go to the welfare hospital. He looks 40 years old, and is either an Indian or Pakistani. Go quickly, because he does not have very much time.
Tehreem felt speechless. She quickly called her mother and told her the whole story. Then she asked about the rings. Her mother replied: Yeah… I did sew the rings in his pocket…..’ Tehreem said: I am going to make sure its dad. Bye!’ Without waiting for an answer, she hung up, took her purse, ran to the street, got a cab and rushed to the welfare hospital. She quickly asked for the unknown man and saw him. She knew in the first glance that it WAS her father. She quickly paid for the surgery and told her mother about her father, finishing with the fact that the surgery will start in an hour.  The surgery soon finished and her father soon gained consciousness. He stayed there for a week and recovered to A.1 health. He was very happy to see his daughter and they caught up on all the news.
 Her father then searched for a job and soon got one. It was very good. He called all his family and bought them to America. Tehreem started going in a good school. And they all lived happily ever after.
Watch out for The Lonely Girls......COMING SOON!!!!
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Comments 22
Tooba Sana, next time, don't tell the next stories name or it will not be a surprise! just write next story \revealing/ soon! Tooba
Jan 8th 2018
wafa Beautiful 1 Wafa
Aug 21st 2013
Areeba Sana your story is awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Areeba
Jul 20th 2013
Ahmed Hey guys, I contacted vshine office as there are no stories and poems and other things at “MY Page” for a long time. The said that many stories and poems are in pending and would be published in two to three days. They also made me to write this comment on their behalf and said that please don’t send things twice or again and again. In this way things are piled up and approving becomes more difficult. Hope you all people would wait for some time. Ahmed
Jun 17th 2013
Sana @ ebad main ne kon same terha jawab diya? I only gave the reason that why my story was so long. Is main bura mannay kee koi cheez nahi thi Sana
Jun 16th 2013
Tooba @Ebad truth is always bitter :P Tooba
Jun 14th 2013
Ebad Mai jal nahi raha samjhe..... Ebad
Jun 14th 2013
rizwan Ebad jalo mat!!!! Rizwan
Jun 13th 2013
Ebad Sana tumhe sahi se baat karna nahi aati,mai ne kuch bura to nahi likha,jo ke jawab teerhi zaban se dia he,waise tumhari zaban hi teerhi hai ;) (>.<) Ebad
Jun 13th 2013
Maarij Maqsood Niceee Maarij Maqsood
Jun 9th 2013
Sana Sidra thanx and ebad I told u it was in parts now combined Sana
Jun 7th 2013
Sidra Good try sana i like the story and congratz on winning! Sidra
Jun 6th 2013
Ebad Good hai.......but boht lambi hai,choti likhti to sahi rahta... Ebad
Jun 6th 2013
Sana Should i or should i not send the lonely girls quickly?? Sana
Jun 6th 2013
Sana I will post it after 12 June Sana
Jun 3rd 2013
Sana @Jumana and tehreem thankyou @khadija: yes so that u study well :D Sana
Jun 3rd 2013
Khadijah Do you want me to read it after my final exams? Uh-no....... Khadijah
Jun 2nd 2013
Sana The Lonely Girls will come in two to three weeks..........4 tops Sana
Jun 1st 2013
jumana It was an awesome,superb and marvelous story. Good job! Jumana
Jun 1st 2013
tehreem Ohh sana its great,,,, Tehreem
Jun 1st 2013
Sana Thank you khadijah Sana
May 31st 2013
Khadijah The heading for the next story make me screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeem..............I will be the first one to read it and this story WAS AWESOME Khadijah
May 30th 2013

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