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Syed Sameer Nadeem
Syed Sameer Nadeem
Meritorious Schools Network
A Haunted House
Published On Apr 20th 2013
Total Comments : 4
Total Views :  503
7 People Like this!

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Rank 8 Out of 10
It was a Sunday morning. I decided that I should go on a long drive across the Cholistan desert. I went to the petrol pump and asked the man to fill the petrol tank of my jeep (army men have jeeps) to the brim. I also asked him to fill my emergency fuel tank. He filled both. I paid the bill and started my drive. I also had a big watermelon. When I reached the middle of the desert I stopped to have some of the watermelon. I was thirsty and the watermelon clenched my thirst. When I tried to start the jeep it gave spurts and stopped. I was surprised as it meant the petrol had finished. However I knew that the emergency tank was full so I went to it. To my horror it was also empty. I looked here and there that if any village was near but there was none. When I turned around I saw a wrecked house. I was extremely surprised as I didn’t see it before. I went to the house to seek some help. I knocked the rotten door. It opened and I stepped inside. As soon as I entered the house the door closed. I turned around but no one was there to close the door, rather a dozen locks were present on it. I was trapped. I looked around to see furniture covered with cloth and spider webs. On the walls were paintings of some old men. I shouted that if anyone was there. I was not scared as I was a renowned army man. I saw some stairs leading to the first floor. I started going on them. Then I thought that it was not a good idea so I turned around to go downstairs. To my astonishment the stairs had disappeared, so I had to go upstairs. When the stairs ended I saw two doors leading to rooms. One door was closed and the other was open. I looked through the open door and saw two skeletons sitting on a bed and talking. I unfortunately coughed and the skeletons turned around and ran after me with two cutlasses each. I turned and ran for my life. To my surprise the stairs appeared again. I ran down and the skeletons came after me. Suddenly I remembered that I had two revolvers. I blasted the locks on the door and ran towards the jeep and wished that it would start. I tried it and it said that it was full. I drove straight home and thanked Allah for saving me.
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Comments 4
Marwa @Who ever the story writer was i didn't notice. The story was awesome but i must say if you don't mind the ending was all mixed and it all spoiled the story. I even didn't understand it . Look, don't think me rude i am just telling for your good sake so that you could improve your story next time , other than that the stories starting and middle part were very nice. ! :) Marwa
Jul 21st 2013
 
 
Aiza Excellent story but ending could have been better........ Dont mind as it was just an advice to help make ur story more better and interesting , otherwise it was all perfect ! :) Good Luck for new stories Sameer ! Aiza
May 1st 2013
 
 
Usman Nice story. Usman
Apr 27th 2013
 
 
sara Its good but the ending is awful... Sara
Apr 21st 2013
 
 

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